Beginning an endeavor publicly, and being quite specific about the goal, is like setting out a bowl of honey in front of an ants’ nest.

You will discover haters when you least expected them.

I’m doing something for myself – I am changing my life. The future I had been living into so clearly I felt it was already real, is now nonexistent. It is up to me to burn that draft completely, and rewrite.

Ah, the terror and wonder of a completely blank page!

I could go absolutely anywhere. I could do anything.

I decided to take stock before I dash off somewhere, sink into my heart, and do some deep renovations; to rebuild my life beginning with my health and my body – the things I know are my own. I don’t need to move across the ocean just yet- I have work to do in my soul, first; I have wonderful friends and a happy life here, I may as well start right where I am.

“You find peace not by rearranging the circumstances of your life, but by realizing who you are at the deepest level.” – Eckhart Tolle

A very good old (of 30 years’ standing- that should earn him a distance medal-) friend and trainer, and another very good trainer I’ve been learning from for a few years, are supports I am grateful to have.

A good therapist, as well, is a support I am grateful to have.

Old-friend-trainer gave me an assessment, to offer me some help and support in this rebuild from the rubble of my old life.

“I need you to get specific about your goal,” he said.

“I don’t know- a bikini competition?” Nah. Didn’t feel authentic to me. “Better posture?” On the right track. “Confidence?” Yes. “No longer giving a flying frack what anyone else thinks!” Heck, yes. “You know, Milo,” (his name is Milo-) “I just want to be Okoye.”

“Train for a black belt?” He offered.

“Hm, no. But I am building a character, and I want my version of her to have the heart of Okoye. I don’t have Ahsoka’s body type, but I can become a warrior.”

He looked up from where he was (HEROICALLY!) cooking breakfast for me (what!!! I know ✨✨), and his face lit up. “I like that plan,” he said, and that’s when I realized it was, actually, a plan, not just a playful conversation. He held out his fist. I bumped it with mine- and the deal was sealed.

And so, the Jedi-hero plan was built. The magical thing is, it doesn’t matter what other people think about it! It doesn’t matter if they understand… but I’m sharing it for anyone who wants to get from point absolute-nothing-in-life-is-true-anymore, to build-your-own-Wakanda-Coruscant.

It won’t all happen in six months, but the habits will be there.

The awesome thing is, people who feel they need to criticize or express skepticism are very few compared to the ones who are supportive, interested, and even inspired. So the little digs made me smile. Their comments feel like little boosts to my airship fuel tanks…

Check back in in 6 months, dear Nellies of the world, and you’ll still be squinting at your screen thinking up something passive-aggressive to say about someone else, while I’ll be living into my fun vision.

OR, I don’t know, join me, and make something cool with your life. Crazy thought!

So. Without further ado:

Day two involved therapy (yes! Jedisuperheroes need to hone our minds and mental health as well!)

It involved drinking water, stretching, Getting Stuff Done, eating right(!),

And a flexibility workout.

Eating right:

I begin with a shake. I prefer a low sugar high protein one called Orgain with superfoods. I add frozen broccoli or a cup of mixed greens. I add half a banana, or half cup blueberries.

I also begin with coffee, because I am addicted to the stuff, and I wish to be able to speak to people, rather than growl.

I’m still exploring snacks. Today I split up an isagenix bar, but that was an emergency fallback, as I was rushing to aforementioned therapy appointment.

Chicken breast. Broccoli. Sauerkraut.

Exciting stuff, I know. But if this kind of eating is new to you, try it for a while. You’ll get used to it. You’ll find you crave it. It takes the body a little while to adjust, if you’re used to eating out a lot. Give it a try!

When I’m super munchy before bed, I have a cup of frozen grapes. These things are like enchanted Turkish delight, so measure them. Really. They are SO GOOD.

that’s all for today- it was mild, but progress happened.

OH! And someone is making me an Okoye *and* an Ahsoka workout shirt! Oh yeeeeaaaah, it is happening. Will probably take a month or more, but I am thrilled!

In the meantime, here’s a stand-in. I bought this in Ticonderoga, NY, on a sale rack at wal-mart for $5. I wasn’t even into superheroes at that point; I just needed a t-shirt, as the film shoot was longer than my clothing supply. (Incidentally, that’s the film shoot that opened the door I stepped through which closed a month ago, but led me here to this moment, in a liminal space with a dizzying amount of doors I can choose next! Funny thing, life- there’s nothin’ like it. 😉 )

Later, my boxing teacher said it was his favorite, so I hung onto it. Years after that, I dyed it purple. These heroes were just hanging about, waiting for me to discover them: and so I shall.

Get Your Hero On, everyone, no matter how long it takes, and no matter who laughs, or tries to beat you up in an alley.

“I could do this all day.” – Captain America ❤️

(This is rambly. I’m not editing it. If you’ve got questions, ask questions- I’m here all week-)